Pat Kennedy Round Up

hat tip;
>Stop the ACLU


Another hilarious Post by Iowahawk
Iowahawk Guest Commentary by Senator Edward M. Kennedy

Like all Americans, I had high hopes for the future of the Oldsmobile and its passengers, as we struggle against the onrushing water and its poorly-designed shoulder belts. But as claustrophobia sets in we must begin to sober up and face the truth: hope is no longer an option.

Click the link above to read it all.
Photo courtesy of the good people at Jawa Report

The Nose on your face
Has an exclusive interview with Mary Jo Kopechne.

Pillage Idiot has the inside scoop on One morning in Patrick Kennedy's dry cleaning establishment
Customer: "Can you get this stain out? I had an accident with --"

Patrick Kennedy: "An accident?! I'm sick of being mocked about --"

Customer: "Wait! I'm not mocking you. All I'm saying is that I spilled some mayo on my sleeve and --"

Patrick Kennedy: "Mayo?! Making fun of me because I'm checking in to the clinic at --"

Nihilist in Golf Pants has the Top 11 Ways Rochester is Preparing for Patrick Kennedy’s Rehab Stint At the Mayo Clinic

11. Gin deliveries will be diverted from Atomizer’s house to Rochester area bars

10. A wing will be added to John Hardy’s Barbecue

9. Shipment of hookers from Atlanta

8. Police will be briefed on where to drop off the various Kennedys

7. Bridge abutments will be reinforced

6. All women under 50 will be evacuated to Graham Arena

5. “Do Not Feed the Kennedys” signs will be posted around town

4. Public Service Announcements reminding residents not to ride with Kennedys

3. Since no Rochester native will do the job, illegal immigrants will be brought in to groom Teddy

2. Apache Mall’s name will be changed to less offensive “Tax and Spend Mall”

1. City ordinance prohibiting too-easy Kennedy jokes